So here’s the thing. I’m single. And if you are reading this, there is a good chance I will be single for Valentine’s Day. Okay, there’s a great chance, like.. a 100% chance. But before you roll your eyes and change your mind about reading this post, I just want you to know: No, this is not a solicitation for a date. And no, this is not a blog post looking for pity. This my dear internet friends, is an early Valentine's Day gift to you. An in depth observation in which I have, through much hard work and dedication to the cause, compiled a list of the best and worst places to be single... on campus. So sit back and relax, because for the next 500 words I will take you on a thrilling virtual tour of the four best and worst places to be single on campus!
Oh, and before I forget, Happy Valentine’s Day!
The Best Places to be Single On Campus
1. HUB Mall
HUB Mall is probably the only place on campus where if you look like you’re having fun, you’re doing something wrong. Ain’t nobody got time for relationshipping in HUB. There shall be no hand-holding, no slow lover’s gaze, and absolutely no stopping. If you can kiss on the fly, fine, otherwise, please kindly take your non-singleness elsewhere. The rest of the world has got places to go and your love is most likely getting in the way of this.
HUB is also an interesting place for us single humans (or for people in relationships for that matter) because we can people watch with ample opportunities for snacking. It’s almost like facebook creeping--but in real life! Most times you will run into someone you know, or even someone you like! You can always start a casual conversation in HUB, but if you’re ever uncomfortable, bored, or tired of talking you can easily fall back into the HUB flow and blame it on what a terrible place HUB is to stay still or talk for more than 30 seconds. If there was an award for best place to be single on campus, HUB would win, hands down.
2) Rutherford Library North (especially floors 2-5)
Sorry pal, this cubicle ain’t big enough for the two of us. Serious studiers only. If you’re not serious, you are very welcome to procrastinate here. But that being said, it’s simple science. You can’t fit two people in one itty bitty cubical.
Let the record show: I am sooooo good at being single in Rutherford Library, especially Rutherford North floors 2-5.
3)The PAW Centre
Sure you can go to the gym with your significant other, but you’ll look awfully silly trying to hold hands while attempting to run on the treadmill together. There’s a reason why most workout equipment only fits one. (Probably for safety reasons, but I digress...) Working out by yourself is good fun! If you’re too lonely or need some extra motivation, you can always pump up the tunes. Beyonce is flawless and she will never disappoint, trust me on this one.
The last thing I need is someone talking to me while I’m in the zone. Sorry to all those extraverts out there, but it’s true. Sometimes I just need a little me time and getting my healthy on at the new PAW Centre is fabulous! Whether I am working out on my own or participating in a class, I can always meet new people or have time to myself. Plus, those science things called endorphins are an added bonus.
4) Deweys
Cafes and restaurants are always great for dates. But if you haven’t been single for a while, you may be surprised to know that cafes and restaurants are also surprisingly awesome locations to be single. Take for example, the potential to mingle. You can meet a lot of cool people at cafes and restaurants, some of which may be even be single! And secondly, there is something incredibly fulfilling in today’s ever-connected, fast-paced world to just sit alone for a little while. To all the singles and non-singles alike, I highly recommend you try being alone at a cafe/restaurant at least once in your life (and no, the drive-thru of Mcdonalds does not count). Order dinner or grab a coffee and simply sit. Read a book, write in your journal, plan a trip, ponder the meaning of life, and if that doesn’t float your boat, there is always Buzzfeed to fall back on.
Dewey’s is a great place to be single. The arts side of campus feels warm and inviting even on the coldest of days and the awkward layout along with the teeny, tiny tables and the loud but not overly rambunctious atmosphere makes for an inviting place to drink a beer, work on a rough draft of a paper, or catch up with friends. I never feel out of place sitting alone at Dewey’s. You don’t have to be in love or searching for love to have a good time. Overall, Dewey’s is one of the friendliest places on campus filled with friendly faces.
4 worst places to be single on campus
1. Quad... after rush hour
Quad may very well be one of the most romantic places on campus. During the winter months you can enjoy a lovers embrace surrounded by the soft glow of LED lights glimmering in the dark of night.
During the warmer months, couples can lay in the well-groomed grass and talk about their promising future together. Gross. Of course Quad is for more than just couples;it can be a great (and sometimes the only) route to walk to and from class or a place to play frisbee with friends but whatever way you sugar coat it, Quad is just too romantic. Frankly, this single lady doesn’t like it. Therefore, she’s not going to put a ring on it. She’s going to avoid it at all cost until she’s ready for romance.
2. Second Floor SUB Pedway to the ALES Building
Never in my entire life have I walked from the AgFor pedway to 2nd floor SUB without having to feel uncomfortable with all the cuddling and kissing happening on the couches beside me.
Full disclosure: I have only walked through the AgFor/SUB pedway like twice in my entire life, but BOTH times I was super single and super uncomfortable with all the tender love and kindness that was going down.
3. Basically all of SUB after dark- Dem couches though….
On more than one occasion during my undergrad I’ve had the displeasure of having to study in SUB after the libraries have closed for the night. I’ve witnessed what goes on, both literally and figuratively, on those couches and let's just say, I refuse to sit on them anymore. If you’ve never had to witness SUB after dark, consider yourself lucky. If you’re one of those non-single people on the couches, do us all a favour and just stop. Go home to do that monkey business. Thanks.
4. RATT
Now I know I just used some of my words encouraging you all to go to a restaurant/cafe alone, but maybe not RATT. I like RATT, I do. But it’s not a very conducive atmosphere for single dwellers. The tables are too far away to stir up a conversation with your neighbors and the vibe is not very relaxing for cracking a beer and working on some homework. I always feel a little uncomfortable alone at RATT. The service may be faster but even with a friend or two, it just doesn’t have that same community vibe that Dewey’s gives off.
RATT is like the uncomfortable dress clothes of campus Cafes and Dewey’s is more like… sweatpants. From the outside, it’s obvious that dress clothes look nicer than sweatpants. However, there is nothing more satisfying than slipping into your comfy clothes after a long day of hard work. Dewey’s > RATT, especially for single people.
There you have it my friends. Places to frequent (or avoid) if you find yourself single this Valentine’s Day. My early gift to you. You’re welcome. I hope you’ve enjoyed this virtual tour.
Remember to love the ones you’re with this Valentine’s Day. Especially if it’s yourself! Wishing you love, respect, and happiness--because single or not, we all deserve it.
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About the Author
Jobey
Howdy. I’m Jobey-- a fourth (+2) year BA student studying Spanish Language and Literature and Women’s and Gender Studies. I don’t really know what I want to be when I grow up, but if I had to choose, I would probably say Shakira because her hips don’t lie. And honesty is important to me.
I have two obsessions that keep my heart perpetually pleased and my bank account endlessly empty: shoes and travel. To date, I have visited 14 countries (studied in three!) and I own more shoes than I care to publicly admit.
I am totally stoked to be a member of the 2014 YouAlberta Blogging team! I hope that my unique educational experiences will help me find and highlight all of the fascinating students we have on campus. Be advised: If you’re out there and you’re awesome, I will find you. And we will talk! :)
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